Call Center Purgatory <$BlogRSDURL$>
Call Center Purgatory
Wednesday, April 07, 2004
  Stop Blurting-I'm not a machine!

One of the things that customers do that just really yanks my chain is what I call "The Blurt". It goes something like this:

AnonmyousCog-"Thank you for calling anonymous services international, How can I help you today?"

Customer(speaking like a Boston native after a double espresso) :"This is Mary Smith from the OppressiveCapital organization I called on 3/26/03 and requested our credit be raised in the amount of $300000 and it has not happened, on 4/01/03 I spoke to AnonymousJanice who assured me that our account #62309-B would be augmented posthaste, and issued me confirmation of credit number UN65343765, when will this be handled in a satisfactory manner so that we can begin to construct our forced labor sweatshops, I mean outsourcing activities in the Latin American nation of NoHayTrabajoBuenoAquí?"

AnonymousCog:" said your name is Mary? right?.....and what company do you work for?..."

I'm not really exagerating about this one. People call up and just start talking a mile a minute and drop 8 digit long numbers and names and locations and then get annoyed when I make them repeat themselves. I finally started just cutting them off and say, "lets start from the beginning so I can get this all in the computer; What's your name?"

If you didn't know this, most call centers have to follow what is on the screen, if you just dump data on them like a dumptruck, it will take twice as long. When you call in, give a brief description of what you need and then wait for them to ask the questions-you'll get off the phone in half the time....


Exploring the mind numbing insanity and childish corporate culture of an unknown call center employee.

Purgatory: A place of suffering and torment with an unknown duration. In Roman Catholic Theology-the place where the dead are purified from their sins.

Email:anonymous.cog at

"One must know oneself, if this does not serve to discover truth, it at least serves as a rule of life, and there is nothing better." -Blaise Pascal

The Cog is listening to:
"Wake Up"
By Rage Against The Machine

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Call Centre


"To see what is in front of one's nose needs a constant struggle." -George Orwell


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