Call Center Purgatory <$BlogRSDURL$>
Call Center Purgatory
Thursday, September 09, 2004
  A Very Enjoyable Caller...

Recently I had someone call me for service who really made my day. Now before you start thinking pleasant thoughts about people helping people and all the world holding hands in harmony, let me stop you. He made my day because he was a jerk and I got the better of him.

Without getting too specific, I arrange different financial services for my customers. The nature of the work is that sometimes I can really get them good deals, and save them money, but there are times where its not possible to get them a good deal, but either way, we do things cheaper and quicker than if they had arranged it themselves.

From the moment I started speaking to this guy, I knew he was trouble. He made a big deal about what sort of position he had at his company, and made me understand he was a special customer that deserved expedited service.

Well, I made a real effort, and secured him at least an average deal on what he needed. Nothing out of the ordinary, but up to my company's standards for service, and good enough. Well, he preceded to lecture me, and I lectured back, here's how it went down:

Caller: "This just won't do. Surely you can get a better price than that."
Cog: "Sometimes its possible, but this is well within average prices today, and I don't think we're going to do any better, we may do worse."
Caller: "I know you can do better than that, why I saw a better deal just this morning from a different source."
Cog: "Really, Ok, what was the name of the company? I'll see if I can locate them."
Caller: "Well, I don't recall their name, but I have been around money for a long time and I am sure you can do better than that."
Cog: "I tell you what sir, I understand you are not satisfied. If you would like, I will scrap this round, and try again."
Caller: "Yes, that's more like it, keep trying until you get me a better price."
Cog: "Of course you realize, I can't guarantee I will do better, and I have to cancel this service in order to find you a better price. This may also delay your transaction."
Caller: "Oh, this just won't do. I need a better price."
Cog: "I'm willing to do whatever you decide, but you can't have it both ways. Either I cancel this service and continue looking, or we put this transaction through. What's your decision, Sir?"
Caller: "Just put it through as it stands....[click]"

I didn't hear from him the rest of the day. I basked in the smugness of this call the rest of the day...
Score stands at:Cog 1 -Arrogant Customer 0
Thanks for playing.Bye Bye.

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Exploring the mind numbing insanity and childish corporate culture of an unknown call center employee.

Purgatory: A place of suffering and torment with an unknown duration. In Roman Catholic Theology-the place where the dead are purified from their sins.

Email:anonymous.cog at

"One must know oneself, if this does not serve to discover truth, it at least serves as a rule of life, and there is nothing better." -Blaise Pascal

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By Rage Against The Machine

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