If you have read this blog for any length of time, you know I hate my job. I've often talked about how this place brings out the worst in people and how I hate so many things about it, and how I am going to find a new job some day, and how I have plans to have a great life once I leave the call center.
Yada, yada, yada, yada, ad nauseum.
Recently, there were other good changes in my life outside of the call center. Before these changes I found myself saying how I was going to finally get in better shape, and I would spend more time with my wife and family, and that I would go to church more and be a better person.
It didn't happen.
Some things improved, I am doing better in a lot of respects. But my life hasn't changed as much as I thought it would. It was this realization that made me rethink how I see my relationship with the call center.
Don't get me wrong. The call center still sucks. Oh, yeah, it sucks big time! It is still the equivalent of walking blindfolded and barefoot through a feed lot filled with rabid, feral pigs that have been there for two weeks after a solid diet of sauerkraut, beer and slim-jims. I still want to leave asap. The difference is that I realized every problem in my life can't be blamed on the call center.
I'm closer to leaving than I have been in a long time. All of my plans and arrangements are closer together than ever before. But its not enough. Leaving the call center will not make me a better person. The only person that can make me a better person is me.
If I don't make real changes to my own character and behavior, I will only be changing purgatories...
Thanks for reading,
Purgatory: A place of suffering and torment with an unknown duration. In Roman Catholic Theology-the place where the dead are purified from their sins.
By Rage Against The Machine